cafeteria conversations...

We were sitting in the cafeteria reminiscing on our childhood memories.  I had known her since junior high and considered her a free spirit without a single negative vibe.  She had recently transferred to the same college I was attending. A friend of mine asked to join our table amid our conversation. I would not consider him as close as she, but I had recently spent a considerable amount of time with him in class. He was completing the same program as myself: a B.A. in Christian Ministries. After casual introductions, he looked directly at her and without hesitation asked, "Are you a Christian?!"

I knew the answer.

"No," she replied. She immediately gathered her belongings and left.

A year later, I completed my B.A. in Christian Ministries as well as a B.S. in Biology.  I had every intention of pursuing a career path in bi-vocational ministries. It never happened. That cafeteria conversation had left me disenchanted with organized religion. I was not okay with beating complete strangers over the head with the translated words from an ancient text.  I wanted to lead by example. I wanted to send the message of religion through love and acceptance... not of judgement.

Fourteen years later...  I find myself floating down the river Green.

Fly-fishing, for me, is an escape... an excuse to remain outdoors in the peacefulness of the wilderness. To connect with the flow of the water and the soft breeze on my face.  To be lulled by the melody of the nearby songbird while the sun warms my skin. To lose myself in that moment.  It's not a place for judgement.

And yet, cafeteria conversations continue...

Oh, that fish doesn't count because it was caught using...
That method of fly-fishing is okay to use on the Provo, but should not be allowed on the Green...
Using (insert part of a rig) isn't fly-fishing...

Recently, I arrived at lunch on a multi-boat float trip. It had been a great morning full of laughs, instruction, stories, and smiles all the while dancing with fish.  My stomach began to knot, however, as I was promptly informed by an occupant from the other boat that my morning experience was "not fly-fishing".  Did I just arrive at yet another cafeteria conversation? I had just spent several hours with complete strangers laughing, playing fish, and just enjoying the moment. They were happy. I was happy.  Is that not what it's all about?

After a quiet pause, I smiled, and replied, "if that's what you want to call it".

The remainder of the day was filled with laughs, smiles, and, you guessed it, fish being played on the end of their fly rods.  They had an incredible day of fly-fishing!

My goal as a guide is not to judge, but to offer encouragement and to support the enjoyment of the occupants of my boat regardless of their skill sets, gender, or age.  If you want to find enjoyment by stalking that one beak breaking the surface of the water, I will support you.  If you want to try a new method of fishing using a sink tip and an unfamiliar streamer, I will support you. If you want to sit back, light up a cigar, and take in the moment, I will support you.  If you are brand new to reading water and fooling fish, I will support you. If you want to try some flies you recently tied, I will support you. If you want to anchor up on the side of the river to enjoy some freshly baked bread with a cup of coffee, I will support you.

I will not judge. 

Fourteen years later...  I'm still disenchanted with organized religion. In all honesty, I don't want to develop these feelings toward guiding or the fly-fishing community as a whole.

The cafeteria conversations need to end.